I know I’m not alone on this one. Last night I went to a networking event to hear one of my good friends present on confidence. But honestly, and just between you and me, at that moment I wasn’t ‘in the mood’ to hit another networking event. My friend’s talk was wonderful, but after that was the session of getting together in groups of 3 for a few minutes to talk about ourselves, then change and go to another group… We’ve all been there, right? Come on, I was just there to hear my friend’s talk.
Well, years ago I had learned (from another friend, who was a Dale Carnegie trainer at the time) Dale’s [good name!] principle of ‘encouraging others to talk about themselves’ to ‘get people to like you’. Honestly, I was at a point where I wasn’t focused on getting them to like me, I just wanted to get through this portion of the evening.
So I decided to play a game of asking questions the whole time and not offering up any information about myself. (Now I am naturally ‘genuinely interested in other people’ – one of his other principles – I just didn’t feel much like talking.)
I have to tell you, it was so much fun! I was determined not to say anything about myself, and just continue to ask questions. Besides meeting a wonderfully nice woman who had just flown in from France that day, and a kind man who recently moved to Minnesota from Arkansas [who knew Minnesota at a temperature of -15 degrees was such a destination location!], I found out so much about the professions, businesses and lives of so many wonderful people in the room. They all seemed very engaged in the conversation (of course, you say, because they got to talk about themselves…exactly!) and the time passed very quickly.
But, to me, the most interesting thing was what happened the next morning.
Without telling anyone about what I did (although I would hand people my card if they asked for it, usually in return for theirs), I had eight LinkedIn requests to connect and get together and talk about what I could do for them. But this was an opportunity for me to realize the value of insights we learn through life, be it from a coach, a book, a friend, or experience.
I challenge us all to not just ‘know’ these principles, but work to truly apply them in our daily lives. The results could be simply amazing.
